36 Week Update

So we had our 36 week appointment yesterday afternoon. My weight is still in check, although the number on the scale scares the heck out of me and baby's heartbeat was good.

Everyone knows I was really crossing my fingers to hear that I already started dilating, but of course I'm not yet. Instead I got to first hear "man you two make a big baby", followed by "head is already down, cervix still closed, but soft". Although in my head I heard "big baby, no progress yet, probably will go past due date, sorry for your hoo-ha!"

Regardless I left our appointment feeling pretty down. I actually went to bed at 7 last night. I just couldn't shake my mood. In hind sight I realize how ridiculous this was of me. Can I just blame pregnancy hormones? I mean come on Katie, look at this situation. You and Eric were able to easily create this little miracle, you have had a smooth sailing pregnancy, never had morning sickness, never really had the whole heartburn thing, your face didn't develop four extra chins because you were pregnant and most importantly at every appointment both you and baby girl have gotten a clean bill of health. Get over yourself and your "plan" of delivering early. Might as well get used to not having complete control over your life anymore. This baby has her own agenda and she will continue to run your life on her schedule for the rest of your life. Be grateful for being where you are at today. There are so many woman who would do anything to have what you currently have. Don't get hung up on this "I need to deliver early thing", enjoy these last few weeks as a family of two (well three with Keags).

I started off today with this new outlook. So far so good. Although I do seem to get teary eyed at the drop of a hat. Beware Eric, you get this emotional mess tonight!